By Staff Reporter
Like a show dolphin assured of a healthy supply of sardines, Jerry Mofokeng waMakhetha, has a propensity to mesmerise audiences.
The accomplished actor delivered a standing ovation address at the Men In Prayer (MIP) symposium on 2 July at Ipelegeng Community Centre in Soweto. His explosive oratory was illuminated by splendid genius on the podium. He moved the emotions of the men in his audience with wit of a comedian and the charisma of a preacher.
Bra Jerry, who also launched his book, I am a man, delivered a nerve-touching subject about mature and responsible fatherhood with his signature entertaining and hilarious conveyance.
“Men must declutter their lives in order to progress in life,” he said as he explained that manhood was an inside job, “you can’t put on any make-up or costume, or walk the part”.
The award-winning theater maestro said to a euphoric applause: “All pretenses will come to nothing if the character is not in you. That is why not all males are men.
There are many 50-year-olds that are still children crying – “die is my ma se huis” (this is my mother’s house).
“You don’t become a father just by the number of children you have. You cannot outsource your fatherhood. One quality of fatherhood is maturity.
“Growth in wisdom, this is applied knowledge not acquired. The ability to make decisions that are right for the institution even though you might not like the decision because you are responsible – it is always about the best interest of the institution.
“Even if it would have been nice to sleep with that queen at a team building in Australia, where nobody could have seen you – wisdom is the ability to say no,” he explained.
Jerry, who is also a marriage counsellor, said men must know that respect is earned not demanded.
He says most marriages collapse because “many boys in men’s bodies want to get married”.
“We have boys who are married. When he can’t get his way, he screams: “ngubani indoda la ekhaya?” (who’s the man of the house?”
He says if you want to be a man, you need to grow up.
“If you want to know if you are a man or a boy, check your diary on weekends and festive seasons. If you are a big shot during those days and come Monday or January you come and ask for money to go to work, you are an infant. It is much better to be an infant in evil but mature in thinking. For example, when it comes to cheating on your wife, be dom,” he illustrated.
“You must be the type of guy that everybody in the family knows where they go with whom and when they will be back. You give this information without them asking. Not the type of guy who teaches his family not to worry about their whereabouts. You will hate the day your wife stops worrying,” he says.
Bra Jerry was born in 1956 in Orlando West, Soweto, in the same neighbourhood as political giants Walter Sisulu, Nelson Mandela and Desmond Tutu. He attended Orlando West High School.
He is the Gibson Kente’s protégé and performed in his musicals at the nearby Uncle Tom’s Hall – opposite the Hector Petersen memorial.
He was part of the Soweto’s famous Community Theatre initiatives at Youth Alive in Dube. He started as an actor and ended up as the writer and Director of the group.
In 1983, Bra Jerry went to Wits University School of Dramatic Arts. He initially went to major in Acting but graduated with Directing as his second major. In 1986, he auditioned for Peter Brook’s Mahabharata and got cast in the production.
But he chose to take on the Fulbright Scholarship to Columbia University in New York. There he earned his MFA in Theatre – Directing and Management.
After graduating from Columbia University, Bra Jerry went to lecture at his alma mater – Wits University.
He simultaneously got appointed as Resident Director at The Market Theatre. The acclaimed actor blamed most men’s woes to the saying: “Our pride is our biggest problem. Becoming a man means you must become accountable, reasonable and in control of your thoughts and actions. Worry more about the things you don’t do than those you do. Watch your words, watch you temper. When you are angry don’t do the sort of things you will hate to remember.
“Most importantly, watch your thoughts, you will be able to call yourself to order before you act on things you will regret. Watch your companions. They say birds of a feather flock together. You cannot become what you want to become, unless you stop what you used to be,” he advises.
